1<h2>unmotivated</h2>
 2<p>unproductive piece of shit<p>
 3<br>
 4<p>hi guys, i have been feeling a little unproductive lately, and in general, really unmotivated.<br>i dont know if its the things going on in my life, but i noticed that since summer started, i have been coding lesser and lesser. hm, but wait, maybe there is a reason!</p>
 5<h3>mean people</h3>
 6<img src=https://64.media.tumblr.com/62fb605157272487abf6415032a7f20e/4fb7d2b50b4fa936-d4/s540x810/4a3c19a981be2e64c257c08bd1346e512a2d275a.gifv height=300 width=300>
 7<p>so, back when i was productive, i had this wld project that i named mot. it was a item launcher based off of <a href=https://git.sr.ht/~shrub900/swclock>swclock</a>, as my usualy wld projects start off as. it was super hard to get lnd to be what it was, i was asking everyone for feedback, showcasing it on tiktok.. almost to reddit.<br>but then, something goes wrong.<br>so i came back from a long day of school, fired up my laptop, and hm.. i had a lot of pings. i scrolled up, and my heart sank. a bunch of mean words about my project had been said by a certain someone. even one of my friends that i asked feedback for on the project were agreeing. i looked at my project. one star missing, and a pull request. in that pull request, read exactly</p>
 8<i>start over, the code is awful.</i>
 9<p>i was like "?", then i looked, and saw <i>-890</i> and a empty branch. i almost cried<br>i tried to reason with the person, but i was hurt, and decided to private the repo. the person then asked me to review their item launcher... bruh</p>
10<p>to be fair, they were right. the code was messily indented, had questionable methods, and was really a mess. but i dont get what is so helpful about bashing my code infront of everyone, and then basically telling me to delete the repo</p>
11<p>but how does this relate to me being unmotivated? well, that really took a toll on me. lnd was a project i really put work into, and seeing someone hate it so much like that, sucked all the drive to code out of me. today, i even looked back at all my projects to see something to do.</p>
12<br>
13<p>dance to pay respect</p>
14<h3>epic gaming</h3>
15<img src=../assets/mc.png width=431 height=314>
16<p>other than being sad, i have been gayming over the summer!<br>played a few games here and there with my school friends, but im banned from most of the games they play (on roblox) so its not really notable to mention.</p>
17<br>
18<p>but you wanna know whats really notable? derivecraft!<sub>join us at <a href=https://mc.9larp.net>mc.9larp.net</a></sub><br>nothing bad really, its a fun game, fun experience, everyone cool is there, and i love it! its just that i find myself waking up, immediately bringing up <a href=https://freesmlauncher.org>freesmlauncher</a>, and hopping on the server. sometimes, theres too much fun, and it stops you from doing productive things.</p>
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20<title>blog - unmotivated</title>
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